Funny One Liners

  • If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong

  • Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt

  • You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice

  • When in doubt, mumble

  • Never tell your problems to anyone. 20% don't care and the other 80% are glad you have them

  • You’re never too old to learn something stupid

  • Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine

  • Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button

  • Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate

  • Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted

  • Impotence: Nature’s way of saying “No hard feelings”

  • It matters not whether you win or lose: what matters is whether I win or lose

  • If you can’t convince them, confuse them

  • Unless you’re the lead dog, the view never changes

  • No one is listening until you fart

  • Only dead fish go with the flow

  • The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it

  • AWESO__ is incomplete without ME

  • Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you are abusing the privilege!

  • A hard thing about a business is minding your own

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Also see:Quotes by World's famous 500 people


Anonymous said...

:) Indeed hilarious!

sethu said...

Your blog is refreshing...
Thank you.